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The Million Dollar Teammate
The Immeasurable Value Of Being and Having Teammates
Jon Hess
April 22, 2023
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If you’re just joining us, it would be great to spend 5 mins with you each week and share in this community.
Curated insights shared with you to lead, build better teams, and do the little things that make a huge impact on performance.
What I hope you do when we come together is allow yourself to be present.
The goal is to inspire you to self-assess where you are, how you are doing as you connect with others, how your teams are doing, and how you are leading - whoever it is that you lead and whatever “team” you are on.
Each week I will be offering thoughts, and actionable suggestions that fall under one of the categories that I have developed as my Guiding Principles that you find in any great leader or great team.
These guiding principles can always be found at the bottom of my newsletter. They fall in the categories of: Communication, Recognition, Engagement, Foundation, Strengths, The Little Things, Being a Great Teammate, Mattering.
What You’ll Find
⇉ This Week’s Content
⇉ Three Things You Can Do (“Where To From Here”)
⇉ Three People I’m Thanking
⇉ A Podcast I Liked This Week
⇉ Resources
The Million Dollar Teammate.
Placing a specific value on a great teammate or teammates is impossible. Some may call that priceless. I’m not here to get cliche and use the term priceless, but as I think through the incredible teammates in my life, it comes pretty darn close.
A team is any group of two or more people working together toward a common goal or objective.
Using that as context, you have probably been on many teams. Whether an athletic team, a corporate team, a family, a charity, a band….whatever connection you make to that definition, then that is the lens through which you should experience this content today.
But we often let the value of great teammates drift away. No doubt you have learned from, been inspired by, benefited from having them. They contributed to your life - let’s work through how and why and then where to from here.
Being described as a great teammate is the best compliment that anyone can receive. (Guiding Principle #7)
I personally have been a part of so many teams with such great teammates who have had such an impact on my life.
Princeton Lacrosse’s National Championship Teams, Merrill Lynch Equities, The NJ Pride of the MLL, CapRok Capital, The Colt 35s, Motive Pure Lake Placid, Sea of Green, Gold Medal winning, USA U-19 Team, New York Athletic Club
When I walked into Princeton, Nick Lane showed me what real true peer leadership was. And to this day I feel blessed to be able to count on so many incredible relationships and memories and lessons that I still benefit from every day of my life.
On the desk of Merrill Lynch, Jimmy Fay and the team embraced me in a way that made me feel like I was home and taught me what making others feel that way could feel like.
The Colt 35s, Sea of Green the annual trips to Lake Placid are examples of people coming together to be together. The “no dooschbag rule” remains undefeated in forming great teams.
NYAC and the NJ Pride turned former rivals and bitter enemies into life-long teammates.
I’ve been so blessed.
It’s why my mission is to help people become great leaders and for teams to develop their greatness. The goal is for thousands of teams to feel what it’s like to perform at their best.
That happens together.
I love this picture because it’s of a team. Faces matter less.
Your Teammates
Who are they to you, and why do they matter?
It is very likely that one or many teammates have:
Spent meaningful time with you
Seen you at your best
Seen you in the shower
Told you to be better
Told you to fuck off and then hug you 2 hrs later.
Seen you at your worst (hopefully that’s not in the shower)
Broken your chops
Shown up for you at an important family funeral
Given you honest feedback
Made you laugh
Celebrated with you
Competed with you
Led you
Done business with you
In all of these cases. When you look at these experiences, what they really boil down to is trust. When I hear “they are a great teammate” what I instinctively hear is - I can trust that person.
How do you place a value on trust? You really can’t. But whether you are on a sports team, in the military, in a business, with trust comes better teams, better performance, and better outcomes. Without it, I will place a bet any day on failure. While trust, specifically can’t be measured, it can indeed show up in your team’s results.
I loved this 2 min excerpt from Simon Sinek on Performance vs Trust
“THE HELMET CATCH”
When breaking down the “value” of a teammate. I’d think David Tyree could assign a certain value to being Eli Manning’s teammate. I’d think people who have played with Lebron James or Michael Jordan could assign a value. Or who has worked for legendary founders and have experienced an “exit”.
Google David Tyree and the image that will come up is “The Helmet Catch.” For those of you who don’t remember, David Tyree was a wide receiver for the NY Giants. Scratch that. The 2008 Super Bowl XLII winning NY Giants.
Under duress, and nearly sacked by Jarvis Green and Richard Seymour of the NE Patriots, Eli Manning hurled a pass from his own 34 yd line, resulting in an iconic moment in the storied history of the super bowl. Tyree initially got two hands on the ball, but his left hand was swiped off by Rodney Harrison. Now one-handed, Tyree somehow was able to secure possession of the ball between his right hand and his helmet with 58 seconds left in the game!
The result led to a Giants touchdown in the final seconds and a Super Bowl Victory.
Super Bowl moments are very valuable. From endorsements to appearances. I’d place a 7 figure value on “the catch” making Eli his Million Dollar Teammate. But perhaps his wife means more to him as a teammate than any dollar amount he earned as a result of his super bowl experience, as she rescued him from a dangerous life of drugs and trouble. (See the article at the bottom for reference).
The Catch
Roles - Which One Are You and How Have The Others Impacted You?
The greatest thing about the specific definition of “teammate” is that anyone can be one. No matter the team you are on, you have a role. How you engage in that role is up to you and can vary.
As you look at this, think in your head who has embodied those roles on your teams - who stands out to you?
The Vocal Leaders - The ones who you rely on to motivate, say what needs to be said.
The ones who are less celebrated but do all of the little things. (My favorite).
The Witty ones - the ones who crack a joke at just the right time, when the tensions are high, the pressure is on, and you just need it.
The “Glue Guys/Girls” - the ones who have a knack for bringing everyone together.
The Quiet Leaders - the ones who simply produce. They go about their business, don’t ask for much but you know you can always rely on them.
The Role Player - different from the less celebrated gritty type, this teammate has a role, they do it well, it can feel as though they may not contribute as much as other roles, but you realize that without it, your team is lost.
The Leader by Example - Does this need an explanation?
The Friend - this is your teammate in your life.
Now think about how each of those people who have played those roles in your life. Think about.
How you grew from them
How they helped your own situation.
How your team benefitted from them.
How (or IF) they received affirmation and recognition from the leadership or fellow teammates for the role they played.
Who did it the best, and have you told them that lately?
Why were they important?
The 20-Year Test
Pancho Gutstein was a goalie for our 1996 National Championship Team.
I consider Pancho a friend, and at the same time, he and I weren’t necessarily in regular contact. Life has happened and we’re both doing our thing - Pancho is now a very successful executive with PUMA.
27 years after we played together, I reached out to Pancho, telling him I was up to something and if would he have time to connect so I could gain a better understanding of a few things he’d have expertise in.
His response? “How’s tomorrow morning via zoom”. Pancho Gutstein lives in Australia….and we were on a zoom 10 hrs later.
Support
David Stilley was a 1st team All-American defenseman for Duke in 1997. I was David Stilley’s assignment in the ‘97 semi-finals (or was he mine). Regardless, we battled. Looking at the two of us you may wonder if god was still trying to figure out the correct dimensions of what legs, upper body and arms should be at the time of our birth. The two teams had different styles, and Stilley and I had different styles. Based on the rivalry, he is supposed to be my enemy/my rival/my nemesis. David Stilley and I became teammates in the MLL for the NJ Pride and developed a mutual appreciation for each other’s leadership.
26 years after competing vs each other, and 20 years after playing together, David Stilley reached out regarding my leadership and team development work, referencing our mutual respect. Rivals that became teammates.
Respect
Art Gorman is a former LtCol in the United States Marine Corps, Art and I were colleagues on the desk when we BOTH first started at Merrill Lynch. He, with 5 lifetimes of experience under his belt, having served 21 years of active duty before getting his MBA and joining Merrill. That was 1999-2001.
Art and I are not in regular contact but keep up with each other’s goings on from afar. Art reached out 2 weeks ago asking for a little guidance on something for a friend. We were on the phone 10 mins later.
Reverence
My wife Sara (Whalen) Hess was a member of the 1999 US Women’s world cup team. Legends all of them who did legendary things culminating in the iconic moment at the Rose Bowl in penalty kicks.
4 weeks ago Julie Foudy had reached what would be the 100th episode of her podcast Laughter Permitted With Julie Foudy. For her 100th episode, she had on that team - the 99’ers. They recorded for 2 hrs. And for 2 hrs they did not discuss accolades or medals, or success. For 2 hrs they broke each other’s chops. They laughed. Yes, laughter is permitted with teammates. My wife said it was the best 2hrs she’s had in a really long time. (Bad sign for me but I digress..)
Bonds
Steve Koudelka was our goalie for the NJ Pride in 2001 & 2002. Coach Koudelka is in his 26th year as the Head Lacrosse Coach at Lynchburg. He has instilled tremendous values and culture in his program. The members of his team are very lucky. Coach Koudelka and I connected because he shares very similar values to what I try and instill in teams. In my talk with his team, I referenced wanting to honor him as my teammate by being there with them. Because Once A Teammate Always A Teammate. 22 years later, Coach Koudelka and I are in regular contact, talking about the good stuff.
Teammates.
Even 20 years later. Trust, support, respect, reverence, the bonds, it’s immeasurable.
No matter where you are in your life - 16 yrs old on a HS team, or starting a job somewhere or 20 years into your career.
Somewhere along the line, you have called upon a teammate. You are going to look up and you are going to need something. You are going to need to feel a unique connection. You are going to need support.
The first thing you’ll probably think of is who can I trust.
Your reference point will be your experience with them as a teammate.
Be the Million Dollar Teammate.
Where To From Here?
The “Okay Hess this is all fine and good, but now what?” Section.
Self-Assess.
What is my role on my team?
Am I doing the things in my role that foster trust?
Am I leading my team in a way that incentivizes the support of
teammates and recognition of the value of their roles?
Where can we get better and how do we put them into action?
Are you being led by someone who is butchering trust.Start Now/Start Small
Set clear expectations and honor them. If you say you’re going to do something, do it.
Perform your role and acknowledge others for theirs - help them understand where and how they contribute.
If there are little things to be done - be the first to move.
Look around and observe. Look for the member of your team that may not be acting like themselves. Relative to how you know them, are they Disengaged. Not speaking up. Not putting in the effort. Showing poor body language. Recognize them. Engage them by asking if they are feeling themselves. Listen to them.Connect
Tap into the bonds, the respect, or the trust you have experienced through being a teammate with someone.
Look for a way to help a teammate (current or former), or be there immediately when the opportunity presents itself.
Tell a current or former teammate what you appreciate about the role they play(ed) on your team or in your life.
Reach out for the sake of reaching out. Re-establish the bond.
Three People I’m Thanking
Alan Leist. Alan is an incredible teammate. He is one of the best listeners I have ever met. At any point in time in my life, when I have had a difficult decision or trying to figure out what’s next, I have consulted Alan for his perspective. He leads with honesty and is the definition of trust.
Every Single Person That Made Up The “Reserves” / Princeton’s 2nd team. A group that could probably have beaten many teams themselves! Not a day goes by that I don’t know how fortunate I was to have played the role I did on the Princeton teams we had. What fewer people see is the role the guys who made the regular players better each and every day and didn’t reap as many of the benefits of showing it to the world. All while still doing ALL of the running and ALL of the grueling physical elements and honoring the commitment, amongst a rigorous academic requirement.
To me, they are the ultimate teammates.Bob Turco. Bob is the founder of Tri-State Lacrosse. A Legend in the sport and a man of values. Bob Turco has influenced all three major facets of my life. He brought me to the attention of Coaches Tierney and Metzbower at Princeton, he introduced me to the person who would hire me for my first job at Merrill Lynch, and he drafted me for the NJ Pride, allowing me to play professional lacrosse. All three experiences provided me with INCREDIBLE teammates - ones that I have for life.
A Podcast I Liked This Week
Jon Cooper, Stanley Cup Winning Coach of the Tampa Bay Lightning. Former Lawyer and lacrosse player from Hofstra, talks about how he backdoored his way up into the ranks of Stanley Cup champion coach by focusing on culture and who made up his team.
Resources / References
